Don Hill’s Feb 16, 2007!!! We saw porn…
Those of you keeping up with atomati, should know that I, Terrance Stoot, will be writing about “stuff” for them on occasion. Also, those bastards make me carry some of their gear to shows, but I don’t mind. I usually get free beer. That being said, let me tell you what I saw at Don Hill’s.
After a few months of recuperative solitude, atomati headed to SOHO to play at the world famous Don Hill’s. Sure, it’s not world famous and is probably best describe as infamous amongst bands, like atomati, trying to gather a fan base. Why? Well, some ponytail wearing, jet-black-hair-dyed manager (owner?) is all kinds of off putting. Sure, yes, Don Hill’s has a great sound system, a great lighting system, but it also has a cranky old man running things. Atomati’s first encounter, this past summer, found them losing a few dollars off the head count because the bands that played before and after didn’t manage to attract a strong enough draw to pay for the sound guy, and seeing as the guys were one of only two bands playing on Friday Feb 16th, the same tune rang true. Not only was the guy rude to us fans, but he also failed to pay the band when it was all said and done.
Milind said, “Que sera, serra”
I asked him if it was French, and he told me to buy a book.
Anyway, why was Milind so cool with loosing $30 worth of beer money, money that would inevitably get me drunk? Well, it did give everyone there something to laugh about. Not that we needed it.
After atomati played a pretty damn fine set that included not one but two new songs, as well as two newer songs (they’ve only played them 2-3 times), atomati ended the night playing one of my favs (Kids and Kings). Danny fiddled with knobs and strings, Milind hammered the hell out of his kit (and in time), and Lon tried dancing. (He was wearing boots, so it might actually be called line-dancing. I kid, I kid. Don’t hurt me, Lon.) Anyway, it was fun, and I admit that I wished they’d played a few more songs, but they needed to clear the stage for the next band.
When the set ended, I walked to the bar and stood next to Ponytail guy, who was drinking hard, wondering what moment in his past could have predicted his current responsibilities. Yep, he seemed to be overseeing a group of five men, all nearly naked, all hoping that their over developed pectoral muscles would earn them grander tips.
What?
Yep, suddenly, naked men were everywhere. I did what all heterosexual men would do – I looked upward, as if pissing next to a guy in a bathroom with a trough for a urinal. What did I see? A television. What was on said television? Fucking porn. Mostly, just a man with a 14-inch cock and poor hygiene skills. Sadly, I can say that the care he showed his pubes was something a kin to the care all men in the 1970s showed their pubes. None.
Not that the man needed to trim, he had a 14-inch, flaccid penis. I felt immasculated.
After the set, Lon told me he took off to take a piss. He’d been drinking a lot and his bladder was full. While peeing in the urinal, Lon noticed that a man wearing nothing but orange briefs had begun to piss next to him. His initial reaction? “It’s fucking cold outside, I hope he showed up wearing a jacket.” He told me, “This is, after all New York City. People are inclined toward the fashionably questionable.” This, it seemed, was merely one such choice. When Lon strolled out of the bano, he noticed a man on stage. This man was wearing women’s lingerie. He was also wearing a thong. Oh, yeah, he had lots of make-up on as well. When Lon pointed him out, I realized that my eyes were burning, so Lon bought me a drink, and we tried to talk about ourselves and the show.
Soon, we all took off to a great bar next door, and got shit faced. In any case, I probably should have talked more about the set, but it’s about the night for atomati and its friends. I’m pretty sure the set they’ll be playing at Arlene’s next week will be man-whore free, but from what I hear, there’ll be even more new songs. Come check them out and buy me a beer.
-Terrance
